Prohibition by the Caliph of fixed-term marriage: Part Three: Woman and Her Social Independence. Allah mentions most of the categories of women involved in this question in the following verses, (which means): "And do not marry those [women] whom your fathers married, except what has already occurred. It is proper that, in the case of the desire of scholars and craftsman, we call those who seek them their owners? I would add that another objection can also be made against this Article, and that is that the Article mentions that if ‘without any reasonable cause’ either of the parties breaks up the marriage agreement, the defaulting side should return the original articles it received as gifts from the other side or their cost. Islam permits the dissolution of marriage for a number of … Dad is Every Daughter First Love. A lot of father become sad when their daughter is going to get married, worrying whether she would be happy or not. Article No 1037 of the Civil Law states: —, “In case of the intended marriage being broken up, the gifts which either side had given or the parents of the persons engaged had presented in anticipation of marriage may be demanded back by each side. Should You Ask Your Girlfriend's Dad for Her Hand in Marriage? Modern youth, the time of puberty, and the onset of textual activity: Monasticism for a fixed period, sexual communism, or fixed-term marriage: Fixed-Term marriage and the problem of the harem. If the original things do not exist, that side will be entitled to the value of the gifts which can normally be preserved, excepting the gifts that have perished through no fault of the other side”. However, in most cases, the tradition has become more modern by not only asking for her father’s blessing but also her mother, brother, sister, aunt, uncle or step-parents. As an adult, you feel like you have the responsibility in your life and start to neglect the parents’ role in life. Those proposals for the Civil Law start in the subject of proposal and engagement. Is it a question of symmetry or one of imperfection and perfection? A lot of men think they are doing women a favor by asking for her hand in marriage, but lets think about this: Changes her home, Leaves her family, Moves in with you, Builds a home with you, Gets pregnant for you, Pregnancy changes her body, She gets fat, Almost gives up in the labor room due to the unbearable pains of child birth, Since it’s something impossible to ask to her mother, who else can help you better than her own dad? Asking your sweetheart's father for her hand in marriage is an act that means different things to different people. Man is instinctively disposed to seek and ask, and woman is instinctively disposed to display herself. But if you feel that you should not be able to deal justly, then only one or what your right hand possesses.That would be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice." It has always been an age-old tradition to ask for your significant other’s father for her hand in marriage. An advantage to women in financial matters: The purpose of propaganda against maintenance. There are many steps to get through before two people get married and each of them makes her heart flutter. “According to the provisions of the above-mentioned article, neither does engagement in the view of our legislature carries, like a marriage vow, any legal obligation, nor does it guarantee performance of the marriage, or bind the parties to any sort of commitment. It means you not only love her but you also love her family and want to be welcomed there. No father will ever let her daughter to suffer after she gets married. Before Marrying. Evaluate her family dynamic and make sure to ask the right person for their blessing. The right to “privacy” of all confidential matters. He is her protector since day one and have been doing everything for her to keep her happy. MARRIAGE IN ISLAM. It is strange that it should be questioned why the Civil Law uses a language suggestive of the meaning that man is the one who asks the woman. It shows her parents that you love their daughter enough to go through the possible discomfort of asking for her hand. The fact is that the articles relating to proposal and engagement laid down in the Civil Law are not straight Islamic Laws. Every dad surely feel a little bit hard to let go of his daughter for another man. In that case he will ask one woman after another until he meets a woman who gives him her consent. The tenderness of her body thus finds its compensation in comparison with the strength of man. All he wants is that for her to be happy and living a better life than before. He is treated as a customer or buyer while the woman is represented as some sort of merchandise. To respect her father, who has been her protector the whole time ever since she was born, you don’t have to hesitate whether should you ask your girlfriend’s dad for her hand in marriage anymore. Secondly, a thing desired does not become your property, nor do you become its owner: students and scholars are desirous of knowledge, a pupil desires a teacher, apprentices of crafts desire skillful craftsman. This is what we meant when we remarked that ‘these people, designing to improve her eyebrows have actually deprived the poor woman of her eyesight.’. He wants you to promise him that you will do everything within your power to guarantee his happiness, just like how he did all along. On the other hand, if Allah facilitates the process, then that is a sign for you to pursue it. Ask yourself: Why am I getting married. It is strange how a person who is incapable or comprehending the meaning of a few simple articles of the Civil Law (in spite of the fact that for years his occupation had been the study of these Articles, and that, as a specialist in the knowledge of these laws, he had been a burden on the budget of the country), can cherish the wish to change the revealed law which involves thousands of considerations and fine points. When planning for marriage, one has to ask himself who he should marry. Is the Declaration of Human Rights an insult to woman? Assalamu alaikum. Unrecognized Email or Password, please try again. If you regularly visit this site and wish to show your appreciation, or if you wish to see further development of Al-Islam.org, please donate online. Incident - Asking to marry a Stout and Black Women Dream Explanation — For her black colour suggest that she is well to do. Is the provision of fixed-term marriage a license for promiscuity? The Holy Prophet gave az- Zahra, his daughter full freedom in choosing a husband: The Islamic movement in favour of women was entirely independence: A man is a slave of his passions and a woman is a captive of her lovingness: The secret of the dynamism and flexibility of Islamic law. Its only effect is that the party violating the undertaking who, as expressed by the writer of the above law, ‘without any sound reason’ turns down the marriage settlement, should return the original or the cost of the gifts that they received from the other side. Mahr (dowry) is a marriage gift from the bridegroom to his bride, which becomes her exclusive property and right. It serves as a powerful opportunity of emotionally relating on a deeply personal level with the people who are about to become a new and important part of your family circle. To ask for your significant other ’ s going to marry a Stout and women... 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